I just realized what day it is.
Not sure how often you stop in, but if you read this you will see that I am a sensitive soul.
As if we ever had any doubt.
I thought about wishing Paul Weidenhoff a Happy Birthday since I liked the metaphysical tang of that.
That would be a book best written by Milan Kundera or somebody Czech and iffy like that.
But I suppose I should just wish you a Happy Birthday.
May you live to be a hundred and still enjoy the toy department at Wal-Mart at that age.
I have discovered my new fascination is actually the crafts aisle.
I find I have an unwholesome attraction now to pony beads.
The hippie chicks who also like pony beads probably think I am a pedophile cruising them in that aisle. But no. I am actually just standing there coveting pony beads.
I almost bought some yesterday but resisted. But I will fall soon. I want the beads with the letters on them. I want to wear bracelets that say sentences I have strung together. I want the coroner to be puzzled when he or she finds twenty strange messages on bracelets, anklets and necklaces.
That would be a funny reality show premise, now that television has lost all pretense to being an even half-moral medium. Practical jokes played on coroners with corpses.
Like have one corpse filled with gummy worms when they do the autopsy. Or have a male corpse made up female. Write a funny message on a dead guy's ass. Or a phone number with CALL ME in Sharpie. See if the coroner calls the number. Have a girl waiting and make the coroner think he's gonna get laid. Things like that.
Run it on that network that says it's for guys with lots of testosterone. They'd think it's hilarious. What's it called? REPRESSED HOMO TV? No...SPIKE TV. Same difference.
Okay, if it's too dicey for America run it in Mexico. They love death down there. Death is HUGE in Mexico. They throw it a picnic every year. Frida Kahlo's paintings weren't considered morbid by Mexico. She was just doing interior decorating according to the Mexicans. Like those werewolf eyebrows of hers. It's all good down there.
I'm on my slow computer or I would add the video of the best version of the song (Altered Images, of course!)