Saturday, September 29, 2012

Britney Spears on The X-Factor

We're wondering how long it was until she saw the early episodes and realized how fucked up her facial expressions are on that show. She has the "who farted?" face for almost every other audition.

One can't help but wonder how long til she plays Cruella de Vil with that new face.

"Britney 2.0" night on Glee was awesome, but I was so sad none of the kids covered this song, "Circus," one of my all-time Britney favorites. They did cover the other though, "Womanizer," and it was the transgender character in the lead.

But longtime Glee fans will note that the show has lost its nerve somewhat and is just repeating plotlines: Rachel lusting after Finn is now the new girl lusting after Puck's brother. Half brother, whatev.

Best moment this season so far on the X-Factor: when that toothless, geriatric guy who talks like Boomhauer with a Southern accent did that tone deaf "song" and Britney said, "I'm afraid you might be one of my relations." They edited out the reaction of the other judges to Britney's funny quip about her white trash origins. As if it was all "infradig." But I'm glad they kept it. It was a great moment.

R.W.

I still giggle watching this. It's been a while. It was on a mix c.d. I made.

So I wanted to recover the video. Alas, I can't embed.

Robbie

Megan Mullally

Yes, everyone loved/loves her as Karen.

But she worked the other side of her chops in a pretty decent Lifetime movie, The Pact.

It was a great ensemble all around. Eric Lively was in it also.

Ever since Peter Jackson did that movie, young dead girls narrating movies in the first person posthumous has become a vogue. This is one of those movies. I didn't check the date. Maybe this came first. I had the feeling it was newer though. Although there were virtually zero references to popular culture to approxidate it while watching it. Which was sort of strange. Kids live in the present. They have very up-to-date technology and the things they hang on their wall tell you what bands are current--or were current if the movie is set in the past. But nothing like that here.

The movie was very moving. It's about a suicide pact between two teens (one dies the other does not) and the way a death ravages and divides two families which had been pretty much operating as one big extended family until this tragedy occurred.

The movie has some complex ideas for a Lifetime movie. The adult characters eventually come to the realization that the rigid (loving) social structure in which they raised their children is actually what led to the child's suicide--well, the dead girl's journal attests to this. So there was love all over the surface and a hatred so great underneath it led to suicide. And how easy is that for anyone to process? But the writing keeps up and the characters all move into that horrible headspace eventually. It's difficult viewing but ultimately worth it.

You sort of want to slap the dead girl for her stupidity in not simply exploding into her parents' faces like normal, healthy teenagers do.

Oh, it's based on a Jodi Picoult novel. Google just "tole" me. That's why I enjoyed this so much. She's had other books adapted by Lifetime and they're always way better than the usual fare.

And it's from way back in 2002. But there's really nothing in there that dates the movie. There had to have been things I missed. I don't think anybody even had a cell phone. But then maybe the movie is set a decade earlier or even further back. I should have known Eric Lively couldn't still be that young.

I Felt

I felt posthumous almost all day today. And most of the evening. I'm not usually this quiet. Strange.

Heh

Also, a Spanish language Justin Timberlake fan page is referring peeps to my one Justin Timberlake bobblehead photo on Flickr lol.

www.pinatasmashing.tumblr.com

is a really cool Tumblr blog.

Thanks for sharing one of my recent pieces of digital art! Of course, I followed the blog. It's funny and visually intoxicating as well!

My piece is here.

It's an Old-Fashioned Moon

I just noticed the moon through the blinds in a dark room. It's a "cloud galleon" tonight, floating through moody dark and bright clouds by turns. It's one of those old-fashioned, hand-colored postcard moons from the late 19th century or early 20th century. Women were paid pennies a day to sit around hand-coloring these postcards. I think they mostly cheated, used stencils though. Some are prettier than others though. So some put love into their draining, thankless job. Thank you, Ladies!

Ryuichi Sakamoto Rain

I remember my mother being in the passenger seat of the car and politely trying to explain that she really didn't enjoy Madonna's "Rain" as music. I remember being apologetic (since she was rarely if ever critical of anything) and trying to explain why the video (Ryuichi Sakamoto) thrilled me.

How Many Times?

How many times have I posted this through the years? At least a half dozen I'd wager.

Never Gets Old

Maybe it's me. But the Cocteau Twins never "get old" to me.

My Irish Cousin

I got to hug my Irish cousin yesterday. Twice. She is a brilliant woman. And beautiful. My brother kept saying how much she looks like Lady Di, and she humored us by lowering her head and doing the "upwards eyelashes" photo shot. And she did look like her then!! She is a brilliant businesswoman and a wonderful mother. I got the feeling she was horrified to see me (I wasn't supposed to be at my mother's house--this was all an accidental meeting) but she "pulled it off" well. I asked her what Bloomsday is like in Dublin. She told me about that and explained she teaches as well. How does she find the time/energy when she runs Gymboree Ireland?? I have always been in awe of her. She has been lovely all her life. She has more friends than anyone I know. Deserved friends. Susan, you are beautiful. And you are the spitting image of your mother, which makes me happier than you will ever know. That Helen's face is still here.

I Used to Be Like Smart and Stuff

I used to know how to buy things to "lay up" against my winter.

But unlike my 88 year old mother, I can't remember anything.

Yesterday, I came across Kathy Acker's proof pages for one of her novels, with her notes penned on them.

Presumably, I will be able to fund my drive to the grave by selling these things someday.

Kathy Acker: the modern Mary Shelley. But probably with a much better workout regimen. That bitch was taut!

Aspirating Bridge

I consider the "aspirating bridge" on this song a breakthrough moment in pop.

Penguin. Cumming.

Back when I was a total alcoholic and dealing with Penguin Books in a very inappropriate manner on a weekly or whatever basis, I wanted this photo to be the cover of my book through them.

They had to diplomatically explain to me that the marketing department said this was "death" for a book cover. Well, the book died anyway, so it's funny to me.

Looking back from the viewpoint of sobriety, I can see their point.

But this is still a great fucking photo and says everything about aging.

This is my mother's life right now. So I totally relate. And it's a brilliant fucking photo. Bravissimo, Donigan Cumming!

So we went with the Paul Cava. It's purty. I hadn't Googled him in years. I was just looking. There's a lot of nice stuff. Bravo, Paul Cava.

Anyway, I'm still grateful for the inside "dirt" I got on various Penguin authors lol.

You people are really fucked up. Srs.

So Leni Riefenstahl (giggle)

How can you not giggle at the Leni Riefenstahl "thang" in so many early 80s music videos?

Geez, could they linger any longer on Martin Gore's face? I'm smelling "contractual."

Goddamn, no wonder Dave Gahan screwed my gaydar all up in the early eighties. He was a total fembot.

I was proud when I figured out how to play this song on my melodeon. My first musical instrument (when I was like five) was an ocarina. I still miss the brightly colored plastic "keys." I should go on EBAY and find it and buy it.

But then I'd just want to curl up in a fetal ball, drunk, and fall asleep cuddling it. So...not good.

It is Time

It is time to do my immodesty exercises. Thank you, Wendy Morgan lol. <3

Why?

Why does one of my photos get one view on Flickr and then go on Tumblr and get liked and reblogged over five hundred times in a day or two? I don't understand anything online.

"i had some basic tweeters..."

I didn't know Basement Jaxx had remixed this song.

I didn't post that though because I was giggling too much.

This is the original. I'm still hearing it in helium voice because of my soundcard. Why is the tempo off? The version I have from the album is a faster tempo. Because my soundcard doesn't screw up tempo, just pitch.

Paralympic Park Bench

Paralympic Park Bench by emmaporium
Paralympic Park Bench, a photo by emmaporium on Flickr.

Favourite Shirt (23 years and still going strong)

Cross-dressing Ken

Cross-dressing Ken by emmaporium
Cross-dressing Ken, a photo by emmaporium on Flickr.

Plan de Paris

Plan de Paris by emmaporium
Plan de Paris, a photo by emmaporium on Flickr.

kuss

kuss by www.kusch-art.de
kuss, a photo by www.kusch-art.de on Flickr.

u & me

u & me by kufsened
u & me, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

tlv 2012

tlv 2012 by kufsened
tlv 2012, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

spray tha

spray tha by kufsened
spray tha, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

sexeh!

bloody chik

bloody chik by kufsened
bloody chik, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

urban life tlv

urban life tlv by kufsened
urban life tlv, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

tel aviv 2012

tel aviv 2012 by kufsened
tel aviv 2012, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

This Israeli artist I just found on Flickr is just fantastic. He's totally underappreciated on there. Gorge photo after gorge photo. Puts a total new spin on street art.

kufsonim/// sened 2012

kufsonim/// sened 2012 by kufsened
kufsonim/// sened 2012, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

tha tha tha

tha tha tha by kufsened
tha tha tha, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

tel-aviv

tel-aviv by kufsened
tel-aviv, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

kufs tha- jerusalem

kufs tha- jerusalem by kufsened
kufs tha- jerusalem, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

conference tha tha

conference tha tha by kufsened
conference tha tha, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

blaaack tha kufs

blaaack tha kufs by kufsened
blaaack tha kufs, a photo by kufsened on Flickr.

Dead Slow Hoot

Dead Slow Hoot by robinrimbaud
Dead Slow Hoot, a photo by robinrimbaud on Flickr.

Raymond Carver + Robert Altman = Joy

Julianne Moore is heaven in anything. Even in crappy movies she's divine. Glows like a Sittow portrait.

"He didn't come in me. I swear to God. Where you going, Ralph?"

I can't convey to you how funny this scene is with my fucked up soundcard. They are like two chipmunks acting out an Albee play. But at normal tempo. Just way elevated chipmunk level pitch.

Opening

I Just Think If You're a Gay Man

I just think if you're a gay man and in a relationship, you should believe your boyfriend's cum has superhero powers, restorative powers. Miraculous powers.

Friday, September 28, 2012

One of My Elementary Schools is Haunted

Lawnton is haunted. You can read about how one of my elementary schools is haunted. I wouldn't be surprised if the one we were moved to after the new "Paxtang school" was built is haunted as well....since it was built on the grounds of a very old school.

Untitled

Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

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Untitled by William Keckler
Untitled, a photo by William Keckler on Flickr.

Dean Cain

Dean Cain does look like Scott Peterson. They picked the right actor. They got his eyebrows just perfect. But now they don't move. Eyebrows should move.

Giant Bowl of Flowers

There is a giant bowl of flowers near my house. It's scooped out of the land like a giant ice cream scooper came out of the sky and scooped the dirt out (half the size of a football field) and then filled it with wildflowers, mostly white and yellow ones. A lot of Queen Anne's lace and goldenrod. I think foxes live in it. I got my wish to take photos of it. Hope they come out, but I'm not sure since it was getting dark by the time I got there and my camera sucks in low light. Oy! I think a fox was stirring near my knees. I visualized a lot of rabies shots.

An Orgasm

An orgasm of amnesia.

Untitled

Untitled by +++ponyrock+++
Untitled, a photo by +++ponyrock+++ on Flickr.

Recoleta 4

Recoleta 4 by JUN2901
Recoleta 4, a photo by JUN2901 on Flickr.

hand prism

hand prism by Octopodal
hand prism, a photo by Octopodal on Flickr.

Red-Note88

Red-Note88 by Octopodal
Red-Note88, a photo by Octopodal on Flickr.

29/8

29/8 by obviously 5 believers
29/8, a photo by obviously 5 believers on Flickr.

I love "wrong" composition.

Write a Novel

Write a novel about the Son of Sam murders from the perspective of the talking dog hallucinated by serial killer David Berkowitz.

Write a Novel

Write a novel in which you imagine Don DeLillo going on say sixteen shopping trips alone to buy various mundane objects. Walmart, Tru Value, etc. Describe each outing in physical detail, at the phenomenological level, a la Robbe-Grillet.

The

The Texas Bigamists are having a rough season.

Close Shot

Close shot aimed between the thighs of the blonde Texan bighair played by Heather Locklear in Texas Justice (1995) shows "Heather's" blue panties with a very large gun sticking out of them in the most awkward way imaginable. It's a totally transvestite moment, as the gun is hopelessly dicklike. It's not phallic. It's too dicklike to be "phallic." It's a dick gun, a gun dick. I am weeping that I didn't catch my camera in time. It was a totally unnecessary and bizarrely garish insertion of a one second close shot.

Believe it or Not

I'm actually posting this from an actual CPU, the sort with a monitor that could break your foot if it fell on you. In other words, I am in the internet Middle Ages. But I do have it on a sort of typewriter stand with "wheelies." So theoretically I am mobile like the rest of you. Or I'm mobile until I reach stairs.

I Wonder

I wonder if one can speak of an ant as having a retinue? I was just staring down at the pavement. It's a literal question, not a sly dig at anyone. It was an actual ant. It had what appeared to be a lively retinue somewhat inclined to frivolous gossip.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

This Lifetime Movie is So Damn Creepy

This Lifetime Movie Network is like softcore pedophilia or something. I feel like getting soap and water and washing my fucking television. Young girl in juvie hall is getting probed constantly because she's taking the rap for her evil sleazeball dad. It's total Lifetime sexploitation. This girl's dad is boning some young girl who is his adolescent daughter's age or younger--after having killed his wife. I think the actor playing the sleazeball pedo bear is Clancy Brown. He always plays this type of low character, it seems. His wall eye only helps. It's a lecherous wall eye. The movie is rather generically called Love, Lies and Murder (1991).

A Great Total Waste of Time

I wasn't looking for this site I just found at all. I was Googling Shannon Doherty to see what are the top searches for her. They run her one commercial on LMN constantly and she's in a bazillion of these Lifetime movies. Her 90210 co-star Jason Priestly is also starting to log a lot of Lifetime movie hours. He's in the one that's on right now.

Anyway, one of the top searches (oddly enough) were queries for Doherty's net worth. And I found this site where you can check the net worth of your favorite celebrities.

Obviously, this is a total waste of your time unless you work in the industry or are an investment broker going after big game. Or if you're a gold digga, I guess.

I'm sure it's totally wrong in most instances. Because it's probably mostly guesswork.

I'll admit I'm going there now just to add up Beyonce's and Jay-Z's figures to see what the ultimate double income household looks like.

Damien Hirst and Beyonce allegedly have the same net worth (300 million). Jay-Z surprisingly is worth more: 475 million. But then he had labels working for him too. Beyonce was working her own chops.

Simon Cowell: 320 million simoleons sitting next to Britney's 200 million on the X Factor. (Did you see Panda's performance on there the other night? Awesome!!) And poor Demi Lovato sitting next to Britney only has three million. Now I feel like weeping for her.

F-Hole Tats

I saw a cute gay guy in a video today with an f-hole tat on his arm. Funny that I hadn't seen that before. Well, I'm not counting the infamous Man Ray back one. I mean contemporary tats.

I did a Google image search and apparently it's much more common than I realized.

Sort of cool to have if you're a classical musician.

I Hadn't Realized The Number of Celebrities Who Had Died This Year

Like it's different from any other year, right? I didn't know "Horshack" (Ron Palillo) died at 63. So many seventies stars in there. I obviously don't keep up with the news. Didn't even know Sherman Helmsley had died. It seems like everybody on the list was either "cancer" or "suicide." Tony Scott jumped off a bridge. I remember that one. No surprise I missed Lupe Ontiveros' death announcement the first time around, but I always loved her understated performances in so many movies. I remember loving her particularly in Chuck & Buck. How did that actor manage to write/make that film and still get Pixar/Disney type roles. Mike Whatshisface. I loved him playing that creepy manchild role, but in the past that would have got him relegated to non A-list fare. I guess the industry's come a long way. Whitney Houston's was almost certainly the "biggest" death and horrible surprise--almost rivaling MJ's early exit. And now that actor from Sons of Anarchy--probably a meth suicide early reports are saying, jumping off a roof. Etta James I remember. Phyllis Diller, yes. She made it to 95. Bob Welch a suicide. Missed that one. The two Andys: Griffith and Williams. Hard to miss those. There were thirty-three celebs on the list I just paged through. They seemed to use mostly recent photos. For some reason, many of the black entertainers who died in their seventies still looked like they were in their forties. It must be true about "black don't crack." I hear black people say that all the time--it's where I first heard it, a black comedian. I remember Lena Horne looking amazing in her seventies performing on stage and bending her body all different directions. In great voice too.

North Korea's Mysterious Ryugyong Hotel

I have to admit I was drawn to the architectural fabulousness of this hotel's design.

Apparently, it was just another one of North Korea's many secrets until it was recently "unveiled": story here.

I know the leadership of North Korea is crazy but regardless this is interesting for its weirdness (ugly lobby) and the fact it's not finished twenty plus years later.

Love the way in this photo the top of the structure seems to just materialize and float without any supporting understories.

But probably that is digital bullshit lol. This photo looks crappy blown up. Resolution goes to shit, sorry. I think it's a faked digital photo anyway. But I like the idea of that topping design and the transparency. Visit the link to see it better, I think.



Here's a much cooler photo of it. In Flickr, this would belong in the group "Ugly Enough to Be Beautiful."



Isn't it hideously beautiful and beautifully hideous?

What is that? Russian Constructivism revisited?

Fabulotherness

Much fabulosity of many artists posted here: My faves anyway.

There are many artists whose work I love that I would post here if they enabled sharing. Of course, I respect that choice. I'm just sayin' this isn't all my favorites but ones I can happily share via Bloglandia!

"I just don't get it..." (Porn Detournement)

Porn detournement is fun.



She's greeting a non-existent "pizza delivery guy" in one of THOSE films. But he's vanished. Her body language seems to be saying "I just don't get it..."

And...

And Mira Sorvino is playing one of those women who will do anything not to lose "her" man--including chaining up her rival for this young dude's affection in the basement and sawing her limbs off. Or whatevah. She apparently is going to kill a bunch of other people as well. All for this dude who's playing it a little lukewarm but clearly does sort of dig her. That's not enough. I'm never sure if these sorts of movies are anti-women or not. Presumably, a lot of women must enjoy this sort of movie. Because it's a whole genre: fatal attaction. Probably the women who believe all other women are "little bitches who will just as soon steal your man and stab you in the heart as look at you." I just relate to all these Lifetime women with the abandonment complexes in these movies. DON'T LEAVE ME!! Lifetime: "Television for Women." (And Sissified Gay Men.)

How Come?

Mira Sorvino in a Lifetime television movie right now. How come women who win Academy Awards so often end up making Lifetime movies in their forties (Sorvino is one of many Oscar winners who starred in one of these) and men who don't end up acting in big budget movies until they just can't move any more?

Some Band Just Totally Gave David Bowie's "Modern Love" the Mazzy Star treatment

in a movie called Homecoming (2009) on Lifetime Movie Network. It was purty. Slow shoegaze medicine ball roll of a song.

Credits on IMDB or wherever said:

"Modern Love"

Written by Davie Bowie

Performed by The Last Town Chorus

Courtesy of HackTone Records

Dayum. Worth downloading if I had anything to d/l to. I'm so ghetto.

"That's Why They Call Them 'Accidents'"

"I'm sorry I stabbed you in the heart 39 times with those words."

At the "Brownnose Hotel"

I Would Make a Terrible Nurse

I would make a terrible nurse. Because I know I wouldn't call my elderly patients' age spots by their correct medical term: "solar lentigines." I wouldn't even call them "liver spots." I wouldn't be able to resist referring to them as "death blotches."

Walt Whitman

Don't you believe Walt Whitman was really a nurse during the American Civil War so he could feel guys up and look at their pee-pees? Come on. You know you had that thought. The Civil War was the ultimate glory hole for Old Walt.

Etch

Matter advances, mind recedes. Mind advances, matter recedes. It's an Etch-a-Sketch!

The Life of a Serial Killer

Feel lucky. Kill people. Feel lucky. Kill more people. Feel luckier. Kill more people. Kill more people. Kill more people. Get caught. Feel unlucky. Feel "remorse."

Hatred

Hatred is a fetish.

A Desire

A desire in the middle of the rainy night to French kiss a rabbit hole in the yard. Is this normal?

Narcissist

The existence of others like a nagging cough.

Time Feels

Time feels like a person. This apotheosis and apostrophe in poetry and prose one of the oldest literary memes.

Aliens

To exist but have no memory of previous generations, no species history or evolutionary or biochemical memory. To exist extra-somatically. And yet somehow manage to be advanced. To be way beyond the human. And know absolutely nothing. Unpredicated being. The impossible advance of time. Time acts like a person but is no person. The uncanny feeling agency must be being.

Maybe This is Perverse

Maybe this is perverse, but I think when earth has too many fabulous artists, we should just agree to forget about all those great artists of the past and start over. Game Reset. So everyone can have a fresh start. So we can appreciate the living more. Think how many billions of people Mozart rendered un-interesting. Someone is not listening to someone complain about their hemorrhoids, their cat, or their weather right now because they're on another planet listening to Mozart. How thoughtless.

The Way

The way clouds seem to believe in the horizon.

Immortality

Immortality is only death's short list.

Pluck

Tragedy should be something you wear. Like a pair of pants. Not something that wears you like a used condom, exhausted skin.

Wondering

I was just now wondering how many blogs whose content is generated entirely by bots have huge numbers of followers. Sort of funny beautiful, beautiful funny.

Someone Should

Someone should do a large series all about menstruation and call the gallery show "Period Photos." Menstrual art is interesting. Kiki Smith, etc.

"Everything is Illuminated"

Everything is illuminated. And that's why I try to be so fucking dark.

Post-Beauty

Most people today are trying to be Post-Beauty.

Prose Poem (with Superhero Poetry Shield)

This is a prose poem because it is made out of prose. And is a poem. This is a prose poem because I feel like calling it a prose poem. The prose in this prose poem was not merely assembled like Lego blocks, the way "all you people" normally build up your sentences, but instead in a much sneakier and much more artistic fashion. This is a prose poem the way a fashion model is a fashion model even when she is not on the runway but naked on her knees with both hands gripping a toilet into which she vomits. Holding it on either side of its roundness like a plate. The bones of her hands, so delicate and long and thin. Bones like willow branches. Her bones are her mind. She notices and enjoys the luminosity of porcelain as she pukes. Because her life and her eyes are given to beauty. Like the eyes of this prose poem. These words stare at you through the long eyelashes of the prose poem. Tread lightly through this prose, for it is a poem. Probably the model arches her neck in that ballet, haute couture way. As her stomach turns itself inside out, everts and gives her a giddy feeling of terror that her body confuses and conflates with sexual desire. After all, sexual desire and terror are very close cousins. Cousins can marry in some states. Probably the woman looks like a Modigliani puking. In the dark. A Modigliani in the dark. Weeping. Keening. Take your pick--whichever you find more poetic since this is a poetic space. That is why she is a prose poem. That is why this is a prose poem.

The Rain

But I turned Japanese long, long ago.

The

The serial killer meme.

The Way

The Way Nicholas Cage's acting eats up all the atmosphere in movies now. And all that's left is Nicholas Cage. Not a movie. People pay. Nicholas Cage converting hydrogen into helium. Threatening to destroy our world.

Smart Famous People

Smart, famous people probably just consider fame a tool. I mean something that helps them do what they want to do. Like the people who make great art and are sort of famous but stop at the midlevel of fame (or below) in order to continue making great art and not crap. I'm sure you can think of many filmmakers like this. But then there's serial killer famous. Fame probably sucks in an 8x8 cell. Some would qualify "infamous." But when does our culture ever do that? Qualify "infamous." A world filled with people who worship serial killers. Serial killers float down my Tumblr screen with surprising regularity. Right next to Taylor Swift. This isn't deep. These are like the thoughts people have in shoe stores. Everyone thinks the same things. "Do they have that in my size?" "What is that fucking smell?" "Which shoes are making that ungodly stink?" So it is with serial killers. They acted out your id, your two year old self. When you wanted to bite right through your Mommy's breast. You wanted to eat that whole fucking thing. You wanted to own it completely and take it into your body. You were probably a two year old serial killer. But you outgrew it.

Why

Why don't people say "ghetto fabulous" anymore? That was almost my cat Malkin's name. But I still consider that his moniker. His rap name or something. The name you embroider on the boxing robe you wear on stage.

"Dear Bill...."

Dear Bill, why do you use words like "failure?" Do you miraculously not believe in Leaves of Grass?!? Did you fail Walt Whitman school or something? Do you not believe in the Gospel According to the Clover on Your Front Lawn? I suppose the answer is--drearily--No.

The Way

The way certain people try to "out-failure" other people. As if there were echelons of failure and you'd better start climbing.

People

People who consider anal sex painful just can't be arsed.

Effortless Failure

Would you rather be an effortless failure or a failure who put in a lot of effort? I know the moral answer is "failure with effort." But then--if you tried--you're sort of a failure at failure. For trying. The effortless failure would get more points in my book, because he aced failure. People like effortlessness in almost all fields of endeavor. Or at least the illusion of this. People love it when great athletes or great artists make what they do seem effortless. So it is with failure. Often a failure who refuses to try will endear himself or herself because of the refusal to put forth effort. I'm thinking of Quentin Crisp right now as a great example. Because the failure who put forth effort is chump change. But the failure who never could be arsed to try is what? I guess a cat.

Would You Rather Be Famous or Rich?

I think "rich" is a much smarter answer. Because fame is empty. But rich is not. I mean it's supposedly hard not to be rich if you're famous, but many people seem to manage to do this. Both money and fame tend to make you terrified of losing them, so in that sense they're curses. I mean if they take over your life in place of something else you'd rather be or be doing. But it's silly to decry money just because of the inevitable amount of guilt it gives you (some much less guilt than others). If you "worked" for the money, that's supposed to be salve for the guilt. If I were rich, I'd still probably spend most of my days in a single room. There are places I'd really love to visit, but I'm terrified of flying. I've done that four times and every time it was a cold sweat. I've read way too much about how people die in plane crashes. I mean in gruesome detail. But then look at the people in Lockerbie. A plane can still just fall on your fucking house and vaporize you. This is a rambling post and sort of idiotic. But I felt like saying it anyway. I'd feel tremendous guilt if I had a lot of money. I'd feel I had to constantly be searching for the best charities. Being broke absolves me of all that shit. I used to worry about not having money, but then I learned if you don't have any money less people contact you. I mean the wrong kind of people as opposed to the right kind of people. It's always nice to hear from the latter. I mean, I don't even get junk mail anymore. And I'm pretty sure I could fill several swimming pools with the credit offers I used to get. Sometimes seven or eight a day. That was sick. No wonder our economy crashed. It was all held in place by endlessly extended credit that was wired in there with dental floss. Something slight like that anyway. A tampon string. If you ARE famous, rich or both, please don't try to leave a comment here saying "I'm both." Because people will just think you're an asshole. Well, I would think it's funny. But many people wouldn't. And if you're rich and famous you know you spend all your time pretending you aren't. I mean so people will like you. Tolerate you. Whatever lol. I love everybody. I even excuse the rich their pelf. Well, with the exception of crazy nursing home administrators who try to "steal" human beings to fill their crap Hole of Calcutta nursing home. And if you're reading my blog, Nurse Wretched, you're even more fucked up than I thought. Love everybody except for that ilk. People who act like the Ik tribespeople in that book by Colin Turnbull.

Innocence, on the Bicycle of Propriety..

The Brontes

The Brontes by letslookupandsmile
The Brontes, a photo by letslookupandsmile on Flickr.

Edward Gorey House 0005

Edward Gorey House 0005 by sdowen
Edward Gorey House 0005, a photo by sdowen on Flickr.

Edward Gorey Tattoo

Edward Gorey Tattoo by lizartpix
Edward Gorey Tattoo, a photo by lizartpix on Flickr.

N is for Neville

N is for Neville by paghababian
N is for Neville, a photo by paghababian on Flickr.

Edward Gorey House

Edward Gorey House by squarecatcomics
Edward Gorey House, a photo by squarecatcomics on Flickr.

Edward Gorey

Edward Gorey by A Lovely World
Edward Gorey, a photo by A Lovely World on Flickr.

Edward Gorey

VANokposterWB

VANokposterWB by zuzu knew
VANokposterWB, a photo by zuzu knew on Flickr.

VANokposterBW

VANokposterBW by zuzu knew
VANokposterBW, a photo by zuzu knew on Flickr.

handbow

handbow by zuzu knew
handbow, a photo by zuzu knew on Flickr.

whisks

whisks by zuzu knew
whisks, a photo by zuzu knew on Flickr.